Where I Am Right Now With Jesus

Posted in faith

God is calling me to taste and treasure Him. Not writings about Him, not service for Him, but Him as a person. Him as my Savior, Father, Lord, and Friend.

Growing up in church (a gift from God), I was continually shown and taught God’s Word, His way of life. I fear that thus far in my life, I continue to shovel more and more words and media about God in, but not letting it take root. Not that resources are bad for us, they can certainly be used for study and growth and encouragement. But I have gotten to a place where I neglect the Person for knowledge about the Person. Does that make sense?

I feel God calling me to a new, fresh, intimate place with Him.

Communing with Him, sitting with Him, abiding in Him. As opposed to reading articles and books about Him, listening to more and more things, filling up my empty space with knowledge and distraction.

What does this look like? I think it looks like less media intake, and more meditating and prayer; making space in my soul for clarity and Holy Spirit-refreshment; and experiencing God as a real, living, active (and best) relationship in my life. 

A small example, I grew up in a tv-watching family. Not a bad thing, but it’s a default for me when I’m cleaning or alone at home to put on a show or movie. So on a Sunday afternoon, my tendency is to binge watch a show for a few hours, thinking it’s restful for me, as opposed to taking a nap. Watching all that tv only fills my mind with thoughts of those characters and plot lines, when a nap to relax my mind for a few hours would’ve been much more beneficial in preparation for the work week ahead.

I don’t know about you, but I only have so much capacity to take things in before I feel numb, stretched thin, and jumbled. The less distracting, mind-numbing, not actually beneficial to my life things… the more room God has space to fill.

And yet knowing this, I continue to shovel. I continue in the hustle. 

I’m a bookworm, so I’m steadily finding new books and articles to read, which give me quick bursts of knowledge and encouragement, but with such a constant overhaul, hardly anything absorbs and becomes a part of me. I ask myself, what’s the point of reading all the things about Jesus, if I don’t actually truly know Him personally?  I feel like I’m missing something there.

I want to meet God in Heaven and say, ‘You are what I saw and came to deeply love in the Christian disciplines.’  I want to be familiar with Him, not just know things about Him, which is what I’ve been striving for for a long time.

I stumbled across this 2015 article written by John Piper a few months ago, and it didn’t speak the volumes when I first skimmed it, as it does now.

Counting all things loss means that, whatever I am called upon to choose, whenever I am called to choose between anything and Christ, I choose Christ. And it doesn’t happen for everything in your life. You don’t have to choose between Christ and everything, but if you do, you have in your mind, “If I must choose between car and Christ, computer and Christ, wife and Christ, life and Christ, the steadfast love of the Lord is better than life. I choose Christ.” That is the first thing it means. That is a resolution in your mind. You have written “loss” over everything in the sense that, if you must choose, you choose Christ. 

I’ve made this commitment to God: I will intake less and meditate more. I will spend more time in the Bible instead of what people have written about the Bible. I will prioritize margin, presence, and stillness over excess media. I do these things in the hopes of seeing, tasting, treasuring, and enjoying my Lord, praying that He make me new.

ps – love the above image from unsplash

1 Comment

  • Megan

    I’ve found not having a tv to be one of the best things for me. It has allowed me to focus on things that actually grow me as a person like writing, reading and talking with my flatmates.

    09/01/2016 at 9:02 pm Reply
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