I have a deep drive for authenticity. I’m not one for drama, or fanfare, or a lack of honesty. And my God-given desire to love Him combined with residual and natural flesh tendencies make for a wrestling that is as common to me as eating peanut butter (which is daily).
My relationship with Jesus is mine, and yours is yours. He’s incredible that way, creating us uniquely but also teaching, maturing and growing us at different speeds and with different circumstances. Some of us share pretty easily, some of us must be mined diligently. I fall in the first category. Maybe not immediately, but I am a readily open person, honest about where I’m struggling or where God’s showing up. I think it’s because for most of my life, not much has impacted me as profoundly as another’s testimony about their experience with God or life as a wife or mom or friend. And I hope that my realness causes someone to be refreshed, learn something new or simply linger a little longer on the person of God.
I love what Romans 15:5-7 has to say: “May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you the same attitude of mind toward each other that Christ Jesus had, so that with one mind and one voice you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. Accept one another, then, just as Christ accepted you, in order to bring praise to God.”
The vision for this blog has morphed over the years. As God changed me, it also changed. It’s happening again. Two years ago I took a writing course, wanting to hone my skills as a writer. It was lots of fun and I benefitted greatly. I had a dream of this space becoming more than a log of personal experiences, but content that would mean something to the world. And based on many humbling and sweet responses, I think He has blessed the effort. (Which is awesome. He’s awesome.)
In Jesus Over Everything, Lisa Whittle poses the question, “How wise are we really if we are attempting to be a substitute for the wisdom of God in someone’s life?”
I confess I sometimes wrote with the hope others would say my words made a grand difference in their life. We all long to matter and I wanted to matter because of that. Sure, I want sentences to make sense, and I have this innate compulsion for honesty and openness, but I SURE don’t want you to finish a blog post and think about how great I am. That just about makes me nauseas. Too much pressure.
The words you read here tell of a woman standing next to you as we journey on. I want to keep sharing, but sharing a life and sharing the God of my life. May beholding and following Jesus together keep us rooted and grounded in His unchanging love.
I share again the words of A.W. Tozer that I find so wonderfully encompass my reason for writing publicly:
“Nothing here is new except in the sense that it is a discovery which my own heart has made of spiritual realities most delightful and wonderful to me. Others before me have gone much farther into these holy mysteries than I have done, but if my fire is not large it is yet real, and there may be those who can light their candle at its flame.“
Thank you for all who have stuck with me over the years! I do really like this space and hope to cultivate more real friendships with it.